Faced one of the hardest days of my life on Monday, January 23, 2012. I don't think I'll ever forget it. But first, let me tell you a little about my grandson.
His name is Zachariah, he's 11 years old, he loves gardening (he has his own garden every summer), he loves fishing, he loves electronics and he is autistic.Zach never comes to my house without bringing me something he's made me or something he's bought me. Usually, it's a crayon drawing with my name on it. You see, he's just learned to write a few words and "joy" is one of them. He's always very proud of those. Sometimes he brings me plants that he has grown from just a seed, or he brings me something sweet to eat because he loves sweets.
But Zach has a different side...the autistic side. He can become agitated over the slightest thing, or over nothing at all. He becomes aggressive, and sometimes even violent. He has the strength of a man when these rages take over his little body and can cause harm to anyone it's directed at. He gets in such a fury that he loses all control of his mind and body. He becomes someone else.
Autism is like a parasite affecting the mind, the body, and the emotions of it's host. It takes a perfectly innocent looking child and turns them into a mean, hurtful person. Or it makes them slower, not as smart, not as coordinated as other children. It makes them a target of bullies.
The aggressive behaviour has progressively gotten worse over the last year and our options for help has lessened. The last option for getting him some help to learn to channel his aggressions was to send him to a program that recommends keeping him for six months. The most heart rending decision that we could ever experience. I mean, can you imagine sending your child or grandchild away from you for 6 months?
So yesterday was Day 1 of six months. We drove for four hours in grief and heartbreak. The weather was gray and rainy which mimicked our hearts pain. His mommy, his dad, and his grammy trying to pretend that everything's gonna be okay, while inside we were crumbling.
I knew that I had friends and family that were praying specifically for us on this horrible day, but I had no idea how much God would do. How often we pray for something and we're surprised when God answers. This was one of those days.
Zach never mentioned, one time, about not wanting to go, or wanting to go back home, or missing anyone. When we got to the center, we had a conference with some of the workers who directed all their questions to Zach specifically. To know Zach, you would know that he is very uncomfortable with direct conversation, especially with strangers, but little by little he started answering the questions without prompting from us. When we went to the "house" where he would be living for the next six months, we were greeted by another young boy who will be one of his housemates. He smiled at Zach, said hi, shook his hand and showed Zach his new home.
After looking at his new room for just a few minutes, Zach informed us that he wanted all his bags and toys that we had brought so that he could fix up his new room. I was speechless. He wanted to get on with this thing and we were trying to hang on to every minute. He informed us, also, that he did not want to go look at his new school, and wanted us to go ahead and leave. He hugged us, kissed us, and sent us on our way. When I looked back, he was sitting on his bed talking to three strangers about all the stuff he brought. Amazing.
He told his mom on the phone that night that he had taken a shower by himself (which he never bathed himself before, and never, ever took a shower because it freaked him out),and he had one of the workers cut his toenails. hahaha. I laugh because he absolutely would have never asked anyone to do this for him but his mother.
He also said that he went for a ride that day to take another boy to get a hair cut. You think that's something pretty simple, but for Zach to sit still while just watching another boy get a haircut is a miracle.
I've seen God work. I've seen him answer prayers. But that day, I saw a miracle. I know there will be hard days ahead. It's not all going to be positive, but it is one step. It's one big step for a little boy who has autism. And I'm hoping and praying it's one big step for a little boy to become independent and happy. This is step one for the miles that are ahead of him.
Proverbs 16:9 "A man's heart deviseth his way: but the Lord directeth his steps."
Proverbs 3:5,6 " Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths."
